I think that you've forgotten some things.....
You starting mistreating me long before we started running. You started smoking when I was what, 15 or 16? You kept that habit up for 17 years. You ate unhealthy foods, didn't exercise, drank alcohol, smoked some drugs, and.....oh.... I can't forget the tattoos (I personally didn't think that there was anything wrong with the way I looked before).
Remember 5 1/2 years ago when we started running? It was a step in the right direction. We trained for 8 months to run a half marathon. I think we worked well together (especially after you quit smoking). But then...... you got it in your thick head that doing an ultramarathon would be fun. Fun? Pffft!!!
I do have to admit that I didn't mind the training for 'our' first ultra, could even say that I enjoyed myself. But YOU decided to start training 7 days after the race, without even a bit of consideration for me. I could barely make it down the stairs, and you had me running again. I really should have stopped you in your tracks then, but I'm Mrs. Nice Gal, and I didn't want to disappoint you.
You continued to make me run even though I started breaking down and having injuries. You told me that you'd let me heal and you didn't.
This past May was my breaking point.... Running 50 miles while injured? WTF? You need to learn some respect girl!!!
I understand that we really need to start working together, we have been, and can be a great team.
I've decided to forgive you. .... but, I'm not ready to give you full control just yet. You'll have to earn your privileges back.
REMEMBER THIS: I CAN TAKE YOU OUT AT ANY POINT!
So lets start fresh tomorrow morning (preferably, after a good night's rest).
p.s. Could you maybe start with a little bit of work on our butt? It's getting kinda flabby.